"Be the Ball"

Lately one of my best friends and I have been walking the track at the gym (we call it the Track of Truth) and solving the world's problems. Ok, so maybe that's giving ourselves too much credit, but there is no doubt that gems of wisdom come out of these moments. The other day as we literally walked in circles she said to me, "be the ball." Though I am not sure exactly what this means I think she's right. At least my interpretation seems relevant.

I'm a type A personality. An activator. When things need to happen I jump into action. Sitting back, watching and waiting for something, anything, to happen, has never been my strength. So, when she said"be the ball" I think she meant that I need to work on letting things happen instead of "bouncing the ball" all of the time.

A few weeks ago, after a rough dating experience, I declared myself off the dating market for the remainder of the year. But then, I couldn't help myself. I had set up an unpaid profile with chemistry.com a few months back and had received a few hits. Unfortunately the only way to see who was interested was to pay-up. The curiosity was killing me, so I did it. No, this was not me "being the ball," but believe it or not it was a step in the right direction. Chemistry.com is a site similar to eharmony.com, but was created by the same company as Match.com. If Match can be compared to the Yellow Pages of dating sites, then Chemistry is more like a virtual match-maker. You can't search for prospects or look through other profiles. You only can review the profiles that the site chooses for you. This takes away a lot of control. Then, there are three steps that must be taken before any uncontrolled email communication can happen. Sounds frustrating, right? Absolutely. Especially for a control freak like me. But maybe it's what I need. It's time to lose control --or give it up, rather.

It makes me wonder if action has become more important to me then results in my dating life. Well, as uncomfortable as it can be I am rolling with it, or is it bouncing? Either way, I am working my way through this. It seems like some of the best things happen to us when we let go and let things happen. So, I'm ready, bring it on. So, that means things happen the way I have planned or if things naturally progress, I'm ready for it.