What a gentleman

As part of my Self Magazine subscription each month I have been chosen as a "Self Insider." This sounds much more important than it really is. Basically I receive marketing surveys from time-to-time that help their advertisers and various partners find out how effective their ads are in reaching Self readers. As a marketing guru, I always take the surveys out of professional curiosity. But last week the survey caught my eye for other reasons. The questionnaire was on behalf of GQ Magazine who wanted to know how women define a gentleman and how that role has changed over the last 50 years.

To me the word gentleman brings up images of the good looking male characters from the AMC show "Mad Men" dressed in suits, drinking brandy and smoking cigarettes. But as with any stereotype I don't think this even begins to hit on what a gentleman truly is -- though this may have been accurate 50 years ago. I think a gentleman has always been defined first by his social status, career and whether he holds open doors for his lady but I think there is less weight in these things today.

Take Hugh Jackman for example. To me he is a celebrity who personifies the qualities of a gentleman. Everything I have ever heard about him beyond his talent as an actor and a performer has been positive and he always seems to be charming and delightful. Not to mention the kind and loving way he talks about his wife and children. But is that all it takes to be a gentleman? Charm, good looks and a happy marriage? No way. Jackman is also well known as a community activist and a all-round-do-gooder -- to me this is the most important ingredient of what makes a man a gentleman. If a man is willing to take a stand to make the world a better place then he is hopefully doing the same in his personal life.

Interestingly enough the last several questions of the survey for GQ were related to how important community involvement is when defining a man as a gentlemen. How I answered these questions is pretty obvious, but I will be curious if this information is used for a future story how the majority responded. Will being community minded be as important to others as it is to me? What qualities do you think defines a gentleman?