I feel nothing

I have spent the past two days packing up the last four years of my life (and much more because I am a pack rat) yet I feel nothing. Anyone who spends time with me on a fairly regular basis knows I am an emotional person (I seem to feel everything), the silliest things bring a tear to my eye, yet this weekend, a weekend that marks the end of a relationship, not a tear was spilled. In fact, I didn't even feel the slightest bit of sadness. I looked through photos, love notes, gifts and even the collection of magnets my ex and I had gathered together over the last four years and still, nothing. I didn't even put much thought into giving away items that had sentimental value. Somehow I was able to separate myself from everything going on around me. I realize this is probably a very good sign, it's just funny that it took me getting home and reflecting on my weekend to realize this.


Am I cured? Am I ready to move on? Am I repressing my true feelings? As the queen of empathy this last option is highly unlikely, though in my opinion I think it's more likely to be a mixture of the first two. I guess the most reasonable answer is that this was the right decision and it's time to move on. It's funny sometimes when you stop for just long enough and realize that you have grown-up. The heart and mind are resilient things that keep on growing and changing though we may not even notice it. I guess my lack of tears and emotion are pretty standard for this break up: it ended without much fan fair or drama and it seems the final days of moving out and moving on will be pretty much the same. What a relief. This gives new meaning to the concept that you can do anything if you put your mind (and heart) to it. Even get over the end of a relationship. Go figure.